The long months of March and April

Well I have been putting off the writing of this post until we knew everything there was to know. It all started back in March. It was supposed to be a happy day, the day we got our ultrasound. I was 21 weeks along and it was amazing to see our little baby and how much it had grown and developed. It sure liked to move a lot. We requested that we not find out the sex. So sorry to disappoint you but that isn't what this story is about. :) The ultrasound tech said she couldn't get a very good picture of the heart (after trying for like 15 min) and requested we return in 4 weeks to try again. No big deal, I was pretty sure this was routine. So after the ultrasound we met with my doctor for the normal visit and so she could let us know how everything looked. Well as far as the pregnancy was going, everything was great. Then she gave us some news we weren't expecting. She said the ultrasound tech. thought she saw a hole in the baby's heart but she wasn't sure because she couldn't get a clear picture. Then she went on to tell us that there was fluid in the baby's kidneys that was measuring bigger than she liked so she asked us to come back in two weeks for another ultrasound. At this point I am freaking out. This is not how it was supposed to go.
So two weeks later we came back and had the 2nd ultrasound. The kidney's hadn't improved and they now new for sure that something was going on with the heart. I was screaming inside as she told us this news. Not my baby, my baby is supposed to be perfect. She suggested we go to Maternal Fetal Medicine for a more in depth ultrasound to see if they agreed with the findings. Two days later I got a call from them wanting us to come in asap. So The next day we went to MFM for another ultrasound. It was pretty cool to get to see the baby all these times but I was super stressed out. That doctor definitely agreed and immediately called a pediatric cardiologist to get us in right away. He was able to get a hold of a doctor that had just left the hospital but agreed to turn around and come see us, so over we went to St. Lukes for fetal echo. The echo is basically a ultrasound that only focuses on the heart of the baby.
The cardiologist gave the heart condition a name: Atrioventricular Septal Defect. (AVSD) To be short in the description there is a hole in the heart between the two ventricles causing the heart to work harder than needed and re pump the same blood over again, also there are supposed to be two valves and there is only one. (that is a really simplified version, I am still trying to understand it completely). He then informed us our baby would need heart surgery after it was born at about 4-6 mo. He recommended closer to 4 mo so it wouldn't be in the dead of winter. There are no heart surgeons here is Idaho that perform this surgery so we are now on the search for pediatric cardiologist surgeon elsewhere.
Well naturally at this stage of the diagnosis I am not doing very good. I am emotionally strung out and exhausted. I just want everything to be ok. This was not the news I was expecting.
After we got all this news the doctor from MFM suggested we get a test called an amniocentesis. To check the baby for a genetic disorder. Apparently with this type of congenital heart defect it is common for the baby to have a genetic disorder. I was almost positive there wasn't one but he thought is was a good idea. James wanted to have it done as well so we could have all the information possible and get the best care for our baby. So on Monday ( keep in mind this was all within a week) I went to MFM and had the amnio done. That was soooooo scary. With the guidance of the ultrasound they stick a really long needle into my belly and extract amniotic fluid from around the baby. I closed my eyes and tried not to move but James watched. He said it was really nerve wracking, because the baby kept kicking and got really close to the needle. That day they recommended I go home and take it easy, so I took the day off work and just relaxed on the couch. They said we had to wait about 10 days before the results would come back. Those were some long days.
Well it only ended up taking 7 days and they called me the Tuesday of the next week. It was about 7:00 pm and I was home alone, since James was doing his internship until about 9:00 pm. I wasn't expecting a call that late but non-the less it came. Unfortunately it wasn't the news I wanted to hear. They told me our baby was diagnosed with Down Syndrome. I asked if they were 100% sure and they said yes. I managed to hold it together until I hung up the phone but then I lost it. I didn't understand how this could be. Me and James are so young. We are both healthy, there is no history of this in our families. I was really confused. I immediately called James and asked him to come home because I didn't want to be alone. Of course he did and he made me feel better about the whole situation. He really is my soul mate and meant to be with me. I can't imagine having to go through this with out him, he is the only one that keeps me sane.
Well it has now been about 7 weeks since this whole thing started. We are both more adjusted to the news. Of course our expectations of this baby have changed but we are happy and excited to welcome this new little one into our lives. We know it is going to be a blessing to have this pure innocent loving spirit in our family. Of course we know it isn't going to be easy but we are starting to get prepared and we are doing a lot of research to get educated about everything. The doctors ( I now have 3 I see regularly) all say the pregnancy will be the same,no problems there, we just need to prepare now for the surgery after the baby is born. I am still scared and overwhelmed but I have the support of family and friends and I know my heavenly father won't give me a test and a challenge that I can't handle.
I have another ultrasound scheduled on Monday to check the growth of the baby, hopefully that one goes smoothly and I don't get anymore surprises. I am tired of getting all this bad news, I was actually surprised when they told me I passed my glucose test. I really was expecting the worst since everything else hasn't really been working out.
Ok, so that is our really long story for March and April. They weren't very happy months but we made it through. Next up: Graduation!!!!! In two weeks James will officially have his master's degree. I am really looking forward to that day. I will keep you posted on everything, thanks for listening.